I get to be a big shot for a minute

"ImmoralMinority" (araimondo) 10/24/2018 at 09:25 • Filed to: None

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This morning, I am the keynote speaker at a workplace safety conference.

I like this part of my job, and I am trying to expand the OSHA defense side of the business and use it as an angle to open up some business in construction. Anyway, I get to pretend I am i mportant, then I get to go back to the office where my employees will tease me. We are moving in a couple of weeks, and my assistant is determined to use this as an opportunity to clean out the pit of despair that is my office. I keep telling her I will do it, and she shouldn’t have ro, but she just rolls her eyes and tells me she will take care of it.

This woman has a lot of patience. I think I owe her a raise.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 09:35

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If you somehow manage to reference Staplerfahrer Klaus in your presentation, you will be a legend.

ttyymmnn > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 09:35

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I hope it’s a better room than yesterday.

My X-type is too a real Jaguar > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 09:40

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The office moving reminds me of when the offices I was working in moved, my Boss’s office was a poster child for hoarders, This was a software company that had been in the same building since 85 this was 2006, we found an unopened copy of the original Windows ver 1, he told us he never installed it because he didn’t think it would take off. He got the copy free from M icrosoft at Comdex when he ran into Steve Balmer in an elevator.

Spanfeller is a twat > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 10/24/2018 at 09:43

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Klaus seems like an assholt.

I love it.

The Ghost of Oppo > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 09:43

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Ever see the “ OSHA is this Okay” instagram account? Seems like you’d either find it hilarious, or nightmarish

Ash78, voting early and often > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 09:47

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Potential opener:

Has anyone ever tried that Nesquick strawberry? You know, the pink milk? I can’t drink the stuff, personally. I don’t mean because of the sugar or the odd flavor, but because it reminds me of the time on a dairy farm where I worked — a milking technician got sucked into the pasteurization machine and the milk was pink for two days.

So how is everyone’s lunch so far?

You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 09:49

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The job of safety personnel begin s the minute the accident occurs.

I would argue that if a fatal accident occurs the safety personnel have failed at their job (assuming the employee didn’t do something like bypass safety equipment / policy).  Then again arguing is kind of a pastime for me.

vondon302 > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 10/24/2018 at 09:50

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Klaus is a legend at my work. I was doing safety training and started showing this. Management liked it so much. It's part of the program now.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 10:38

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You blanked out your name, but most people here I know it I’d wager.

You’re “blue haired lawyer”

DipodomysDeserti > ImmoralMinority 10/24/2018 at 11:12

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A buddy of mine worked at Amazon corporate for a while processing stuff like this. It was terrifying hiw closely big corporations operate like the machines in The Matrix.

The guy who hired him, a higher up at Amazon, ended up commiting suicide, and my buddy left to become a message therapist. We live in a truly mad world.